Friday, November 17, 2006

"Well we all shine on..." - John Lennon

Core fundamental values... a rather imposing and thought provoking proclamation. I never seriously considered exploring my own core values until I read this blog. "What's so important about discovering and following your own core values", you ask? Lots of things, my friends, lots. Your core values define who you are and what you stand for. Defining and living by your core values can make you a stronger and successful person who will attract the things your values stand for. I'm starting to realize that most people ignore or don't have a clue as to what their core values really are. Or worse, they try to feed off of others in order to borrow a "trendy" set of (what they think are) core values. It's no wonder some people wander through life aimlessly, never realizing a true goal (or happiness). And it's no wonder people hurt and mistreat each other, either because they never bothered to set some values in their life, or, they get scared when they realize that it's difficult to maintain some values and end up abandoning them.

After that little rant, I have to admit it's not easy to look inside one's self and determine one's core fundamental values. Plus, I suppose our core values will change and solidify as we mature.

Some of my core fundamental values:

Honesty - This is my number one core fundamental value. I have found it to be one of my most useful tools.

Compassion - Some people see this as a weakness. I don't. The world needs more compassion and less greed and selfishness.

Loyalty - When I believe in someone or something I am loyal to a fault.

Knowledge - I love to learn and I truly believe we have an unlimited capacity for learning. Learning is healthy!

Humor - One has to be able to laugh at one's self at times.

What are your core fundamental values?

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3 Comments:

At 7:21 PM, Blogger No_the_game said...

Greg,

I am so honored to see that our blog can lead such a wonderful post.

YOu know I sometimes think/wonder if core value is a true core value or it can be negotiated. For example there are somethings I think is such a core value to me that it can even prevent me to meet man of my dreams. ( if there is such a thing)

I feel like I am just dancing around my thoughts. For example I was dating this guy who was so close to his family and friends. That is a core value to him. But i can care less, you know.

As far as honesty I think it depends you uses measure cup. Does that make sense. I also dated this guy who used to think as long as you do not know what I do that does not count. He had sort of "don't ask, don't tell" policy. So it was honesty to him. For me it was not.

I used to believe and still believe if I do not have a ring on my finger I do not belong anybody. I am free to do whatever I choose to do. I can choose go to date with other people or I can choose not to do it.

I do not know. Some people think when you are with somebody for a long period of time that means bond. For me if i am with somebody for a long period of time and that person do not take a step to make it serious then it is not a bond.

I am so confused Greg. Any help of suggestion?

With luv,

No_the_game

P.S How do you label your posting?

 
At 10:06 PM, Blogger Greg said...

Hi no_the_game,

Thanks for your wonderful comment!

I have also wondered about the issue of core values being negotiated. Is that a good thing or a bad thing to do? Does that mean we are compromising and possibly hurting ourselves? It can all be very confusing at times, and believe me, I have agonized over this issue for the last several years.

I find that right now I am able to use my core values as an anchor. I am finding this technique particularly useful as I have been "adrift" for too long. It gives me a baseline on which to restart or modify things in my life.

You are so right with your comment about people's values being totally different than one's own. I suppose this is where yet another core value should be thought about - Tolerance. Tolerance as a core value is one I haven't even thought about 'till now. Interesting, as we use it every minute of the day. There is a very fine line indeed between tolerance and compromise. Hmmm...

I'm pretty stubborn on the issue of honesty. I have been burned by people dishonest to themselves and me too many times. I see nothing to be gained by being dishonest except for possible grief down the road.

Be very careful of your belief that a ring on your finger actually means anything. If your dating is casual, then dating others is probably not a big deal. If your dating is serious - well, then you are asking for trouble and pain. If you want someone to commit to you, you'll have to show some commitment too. If the person you are dating wants some commitment, but just ends up seeing you 'cause it's convenient is not good either. You end up using each other instead of investing in each other. Hmmm... I think that's what may of happened with my little "affair". Nevertheless, having a ring on one's finger surely doesn't make the love any deeper or the sun shine any brighter. :) Things can go just as wrong with a ring on, as things can with dating.

Sorry for the "stern" lecture. I myself am still feeling the affects of someone I who I cared for, who feels she can do whatever she wants (and I guess she can).

Someone will come along that will feel so good that you'll know he's the one. It takes time. That's the hard part; waiting and looking and hurting... Yuk!

Greg

 
At 10:13 PM, Blogger Greg said...

P.S. - You can label posts in the "Edit Posts" page. You'll see a pull-down box named "Label", which you can use to assign whatever labels you want. I'm still trying to figure it all out...

 

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